Thursday, September 4, 2008

Fame, Fortune, and Forgetfulness

I hate reality TV.

Unless it's Cops, or something like FBI Files or The Investigators or something, it's not "reality." I refuse to believe that these people who are on shows like "Survivor," really are as irritating as they come across.

Especially considering the paychecks involved.

But, MSNBC is, apparently, surprised to learn that "people seek fame, fortune on reality TV." I say "apparently" because that's the actual title of the article.

The word, "DUH?" comes to mind. You don't have to have talent to be on reality tv--but, if you're female, you -do- need to be supermodel-esque. Name me one overweight reality series woman. Even on "American Idol," you have to fit a certain "mold."

That. Is bumpkis.

"There's a hole in the world like a great, black pit and it's filled with people who are filled with shit and it goes by the name of..." Hollywood. (Play that link while you read this. Just trust me). That's right. Hollywood wants everyone to believe that they have to be a size 2 waist and 38DD chest. Hollywood wants everyone to believe that they have to have young, chiseled features and ripped abs to be a success.

Marilyn Monroe was a size 14 at the peak of her career. Marlon Brando, even at his heaviest, was still -quite- the actor and leading man. Want more modern examples? Queen Latifah--one of the most beautiful women I've seen--not a size 2. I couldn't name you an actor that's not "handsome" for comparison. Mostly because Hollywood's bought it's own line of crap and won't cater to anyone that weighs more than a toothpick.

So, in this article on MSNBC, it names off several of the famous reality show people. Funny thing is, the only one I've ever heard of was the chick who's now on The View--and that's by pure happenstance, since I boisterously despise that show. Are these people -really- famous?

They're not A-listers, that's for sure. They most likely never will be. Actors who have struggled to get where they are aren't exactly fond of "reality TV." Do you think Matt Damon (who was turned down at auditions at least 150 times) would really appreciate some talentless hack of a toothpick saddling up to him for the next Borne movie? Do you think Christian Bale wants a "reality star" next to him in the next Batman? Probably not, but most likely because he's afraid the reality star may actually have more talent than he does. BOOM! Yes! I don't like Christian Bale. Sue me. I hated Batman Begins (loved Cillian Murphy as Scarecrow) and was only mildly entertained by The Dark Knight--and only because Heath Ledger was the focus of the movie.

I digress.

The simple fact that there are "auditions" for "reality" TV troubles me. In my way of thinking, if you're going to write a reality series(?!), then you should be out getting a random sampling of America. You see someone at the grocery store, you tap their arm and say, "Come with me. I want to offer you the chance to win $1 million dollars..." If they say no, you move on to the next person til you have your cast.

You don't script reality.


Reality TV is not life.

Besides, the fifteen minutes of fame and the grand prize fortune never last as long as hard work. True, for some people, reality TV has opened doors for their businesses, but...let's be real. Does anyone really care who Jonny Fairplay is? If you ask me, it sounds more like a porn star than a reality star...

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