Got Gas?

I'm having a difficult time with this.

I'm sitting here in over-priced, over-taxed Califorina--where we have oil rigs off the coast in the Pacific and in other people's back yards--wondering one thing.

HOW in Bixby's Nine Hells is there a GASOLINE SHORTAGE!?!

How much further does America need to bend over for the middle eastern countries who've all but told us to "F**k off and die" to cram their bull up our proverbial butts?!

Last I checked, Texas was known for its oil production.

So, I suppose I, as a silly American, am wondering just what the heck we're doing that we're running out of gasoline! The $4.25 I pay per gallon has to be going somewhere. I can guarantee it's not for upgrades to the gas station. It's going into some oil tycoons pocket.

Yes, Mr. President, I'm looking at you.

And your cabinet.

It's no secret, there. But, for crying out loud! A gas shortage?! Really!? What was this war about in the first place? Oh, right... Afghanistan hosted the Al Quida which came into our country and killed a few hundred innocent people.

Which makes sense that we would invade Iraq.

Because, ya know... they're so close in location. It's an easy mistake.

So, what are these poor people in Tennessee doing? Probably wishing that America would call its proctologist to have its head removed. Thank GOD the elections are soon. Not that McCain or Obama will necessarily fix the problem. But, in either case, I won't feel like my President has the brain of a carrot.

Which could be an insult to the carrot.

I love America. I think Bush has done some wonderful things... just not lately. And, sadly, any respect I had for him is now gone. He's done too many boneheaded things for me to feel confident in saying I support him.

I support the country. Not the one holding the reigns.

Please, though, don't assassinate him? The Vice President isn't much better...

Let's just focus on the right war--the one that resolves the problem of America getting her rear end handed to her seven years ago. SEVEN FREAKING YEARS!

...and we've got a gas shortage...

Lemme think here...

*Enter into a needless war with a country who wasn't a real threat at the time
*Waste taxpayers' money by keeping our troops in said war
*Keep feeding the American populace bull about how this war will help the economy
*Do ABSO-FREAKIN'-LUTELY NOTHING when the gas prices go from $1.75 per gallon to $4.75 per gallon
*Blame said increase ON THE WAR THAT WE STARTED
*Suddenly find ourselves in a gasoline crisis "because we're at war with our oil suppliers."

Here's an idea.

Get the heck out of Iraq. Let their government collapse in on itself and let them rebuild on their own. Utilize the oil that's in our own back yard while we develop alternate forms of energy. Hybrids are a good example. I'm pretty sure these scientist that waste money on needless research would be able to come up with a way to use ethenol alcohol for fuel.

I'm sick of hearing, "We can't..."

Of course we can't.

Because we're not a people who like to leave our little comfort zones. Get a divergent thinker on the team and watch those "can't's" turn into "can's."

Unless, of course, they're a Republican.

The Oil Conspiracy

It's in the news everywhere. Gas prices are on the rise again. I don't need to link you to MSNBC or CNN for you to find a news story on the war and the price of gas in California. In fact, if you live in California, you can just walk to the gas station and scream. Or...just look at your keys. If you can afford it.

Everyone has always told me that war is a good economy-booster. But, who's really benefiting from this war in the Middle East? First of all, I don't think any of those countries have said, "Hey, America! Thanks for giving it the ol' college try!" In fact, I think those countries have pretty much done the opposite and shot our boys and girls in the back.

Yet we stay.

Their government will fall apart if we leave.

I have one thing to say to that: "WHO IN BIXBY'S NINE HELLS CARES?!" It's a volatile area. They've been at war with each other for centuries and here's a newsflash--they'll keep being at war until they either all die out or Jesus comes back (or for the first time, if you're Jewish). Don't sell me on a war you want to have by saying it's a fight on terrorism.

Also, in this "war on terrorism," don't take away my rights as an American citizen and say it's for my safety. If I were going to explode a bomb on a plane, I wouldn't wait in a 2 hour security check line. I'd dress as an employee. Also? What's with the "60% of 'fake' bombs" making it through the TSA checkpoint? Yes. Well done, Homeland Security. Well done.

When the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor, we didn't tell the American Citizens they couldn't carry toothpaste in their carry on if it was over 3oz. We attacked the Japanese. So, when Al Quida gave the directive to fly planes into the Pentagon and Twin Towers...why, exactly are we not able to carry liquids over 3oz? THEY FLEW THE FREAKING PLANE!!!

Maybe we should check, oh, I dunno, PILOT LICENSES?

As much as I love our American troops, I still think Asylum Street Spankers have the right idea with "Stick Magnetic Ribbons (On Your SUV)." You can watch it here. So, maybe the Federal Government should visit a proctologist to remove the heads out of the rear ends of those people making the decisions to take away or violate my indelible rights. It's not terroristic to speak your mind. It's actually in the Constitution that one can do so--it's called "FREE SPEECH."

Why are the oil prices a conspiracy? Because the price per gallon doesn't need to be as high as it is. There's no reason for it. It's a way for the oil moguls to continue to ecru wealth. I don't see them stepping up to help pay off America's debt. I also don't see them really helping the economy, either. If a person makes $7.25/hr and has to spend $4.50/gallon, then on top of that pay for food, water, electricity, rent... It's virtually impossible.

It's a conspiracy against the American public. It's falling into order what Regan stated about America (depending on who you believe, he was either quoting Lenin or misquoting him):

After Russia we will take Eastern Europe, then the masses of Asia, then we will encircle the United States which will be the last bastion of capitalism. We will not have to attack. It will fall like an overripe fruit into our hands.

We're falling into the hands of something, America. And it ain't pretty.