Child Pr0n...by Children

Okie dokie. Double-shot today. Too much stupid in the world for me to go without yet another classic rant.

Not class-y. That would imply I had tact. I think you all know by now that I do not.

WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT, CHARLIE?!

This gem of an article was supplied to me by a friend who, I swear, just wants to see me have a conniption. I don't even think he reads my blog. He just sends me random articles that make my head spin.

So. Let's detail this article for those of you to lazy to right-click "open new tab/window."

A 15-year old girl from Licking Valley (I'm not lying..but, you haven't read the original article, so you don't know...ha! You just have to TRUST ME!) has been held in a juvenile detention center and placed under house arrest for allegedly (because she hasn't been convicted yet) taking nude photographs of herself with her cell phone, then sending them to her friends.

Yes.

Arrested.

This is the clincher: The judge is trying to decide if she should have to register as a sex-offender for the next 20 years.

Again. WHISKEY TANGO FOXTROT!?!

First. She's fifteen. FIFTEEN. FIF-FREAKIN'-TEEN! Why does she even need a camera phone?!

Second. She's fifteen. When have you known a fifteen year old to be perfect? Stupid? Yes. Sex offender?! HARDLY.

America really needs to visit its proctologist to have that large stick removed from its rear--oh, wait...it's not a stick. It's the HEAD. Good grief, people!

Oh, and on top of all this... the kids she SENT the pictures to are being considered for trial for possession of child pornography.

I really cannot say how sad this makes me... Not that I feel sorry for these kids for doing stupid, kid things. I say suspend them from school--make 'em work as a caregiver for babies of unwed mothers or something. Community service to make 'em realize that it's not the brightest thing in the world. But, making them register as SEX OFFENDERS!?! I don't think so.

Sending nudie pics of yourself to your peers is one thing. Gettin' it on with a 10 year old when you're 19 or older is another thing all together. I think people need to take a step back. Yes, the girl was warned it was stupid, but you know what? It's her choice to do something stupid. Locking kids in a bubble isn't the answer. Perhaps kicking God out of the public schools wasn't such a bright idea, either. At least when He was still allowed to attend, there was a sense of morals...and kids weren't bringing guns to school...or backtalking their teachers... or... or...

Honestly, I'm surprised they haven't tried to arrest the girl's parents for something like pimping their child or mentally abusing her to the point of making her think that was a good idea, or some other tripe that people try to charge adults with because no one seems to think that kids can be responsible for their own actions. Kinda like this guy. Read the article and see if you catch what I mean about his charges. Don't get me wrong, that guy should be locked away...but, do it for the right reasons. Don't make it an OJ thing.

It really tweaks my gut when I hear about kids--TEENS--who have the ability to think and be rational--be charged with heinous crimes that label them "sex offenders" because some adult somewhere thinks they're the righteous ones. Example: A 16 year old and her 18 year old boyfriend consummated their relationship. The parents were upset by this and brought charges against the 18 year and now, that 18 year old has to register as a sex offender because his girlfriend was "a minor."

GET A FREAKING CLUE, PEOPLE!

Self-righteousness has no place in our courts. Especially when the lives of soon-to-be adults are involved. In 3 years, if she'd have sent nuddie pics to her college friends, no one would even bat an eye. Age is relative. Common sense isn't.

Bring Out the OJ

Just when you thought you were done with court room drama, OJ Simpson waltzed his way back into your living room.

First of all: Whether you think he's guilty of a double homicide or not, he's still a person. Since he was acquitted and not found innocent, there is still room for doubt. But, 12 people couldn't come to a unanimous decision and that, my friends, is how the American legal system works. A jury of peers (as provided under the Bill of Rights) listens to two sets of attorneys try to convince them that the accused is either guilty or innocent. It can be a fun prospect if you're a sado-masochist or are at all interested in analysis of facts and truth.

I'll let you wonder which one I am.

Second of all: If someone steals your stuff and plans to sell it, there are procedures in place to get it back. Speaking from experience, those procedures don't work. Unless there's a movie camera on the cop's shoulder. Even then, I have my doubts.

Third of all: If any average citizen were to bust down a door to reclaim their own stolen property, brandishing a handgun (for which he possessed a license), I dare say no one would bat an eye. In fact, I think he may actually receive a medal of commendation.

Instead, Mr. Simpson received an arrest warrant.

"He was stealing sports memorabilia!" the prosecution wailed.

He was reclaiming HIS stuff. The last time I checked, OJ Simpson was...a football player. He was a running back. I would think he would probably have some sports memorabilia related to, say, the Buffalo Bills or the 49'ers. Just a guess. So, the people in Las Vegas who were "assaulted" by Mr. Simpson and five other guys (four of which have changed their stories and turned states' evidence, I might add...anyone else smell something rotten in Denmark?)

I understand you have to prove the stuff was yours before you reclaim it. We learn this in school. But, you know what? Just like in school, when someone takes your stuff--you take it back. Erase, if you can, the previous trial. Start fresh--just like the jury has to. Do you honestly believe that OJ Simpson would bust into a hotel room with five other guys, allegedly brandishing guns, and demand to take only the stuff that belonged to him--IF IT DIDN'T?! He's dumb, but not that dumb.

Give it up, folks. Seriously. There are so many better things to do with your time than try to get OJ Simpson behind bars for something you can't even PROVE he did! I'm sorry, you can believe he killed Nicole Brown-Simpson and Ronald Goldman all you want. There is no solid PROOF that he did. There is circumstantial evidence. There is a messy crime scene. There were errors. You want to know why Simpson was acquitted? Shoddy police work.

You want to know why he's, once again, infesting your living rooms with his smug mug? Shoddy police work. Just stop already. How is this even news worthy?! Who in Bixby's Nine Hells even CARES? Half of America thinks he was guilty the first time around, the other half of America thinks he was innocent...and the third half doesn't give two sticks!

Whatever. I'm done with OJ. I was done with OJ after the third week of the first trial. I got bored with the prosecution trying to convince me that one man killed two people the way they had it set up. In-friggin-possible. Even for a running back. No dice. Next theory please?

Do I think he did it? Maybe... but, I'm pretty positive he knows exactly what and how it went down and he's not sharing it for reasons beyond us.

Do I think this case in Las Vegas is legit? You're joking, right? Armed robbery and kidnapping--I don't think so. Show me the gun. According to the defense, the prosecution's "recorded conversation" of the event proves th---

Wait, what?

There was an audio recording of the deal? Did Mr. Simpson know about this recording?! *sniff* Set up, much?